‘INVULNERABLE’

Priscilla, now 15 had anything but an idyllic childhood. She grew up in an impoverished inner city home with an alcoholic father who sexually abused her and her young sister. Her mother was hospitalized twice with nervous “break -down”. 

When Priscilla was 7 years of age, her father called his family together in the living room and told them. “You drove me to this”. He then put a gun to his head and committed suicide as his wife and children watched in horror. From that time on Priscilla had to work after school to help support the family. Her mother became increasingly disturbed and sometimes beat her.

Considering her background, we might expect Priscilla to be an unhappy, maladjusted child, her emotional life dominated by anxiety, anger and depression.

Instead, she grew a delightful and popular young woman who was emotionally well adjusted, President of her high school class, a talented singer and an honor student.  Children like Priscilla have been termed: ”invulnerable” or resilient” youngsters.

What allows resilient people to rise above extra ordinary stressful environment, while some individuals blessed with more benign life histories collapse under the weight of less severe stress? One of such attributes is Good social Support Group.

Priscilla had social support group who helped to blunt the impact of the terrible stresses they experienced in their daily lives.

A psychologist, Emmy Werner noted,” without exception, all of the children who thrived had at least one person that provided them with consistent emotional support- a grandmother, an older sister, a teacher, or a neighbor”

For Priscilla, that person was a school teacher who cared enough to befriend and encourage her during her childhood years. A series of studies conducted suggests the importance of having someone to talk to about upsetting experiences which in turn purges negative emotions. Someone who can Say: “you can do it!”

References: new York Times, October 13, 1997, Garbarino, 1995, Garmezy, 1983: 30 year longitudinal study of resilient children.